Wednesday, November 10, 2010

10 TIPS TO A BETTER YOU

10 little things that could make a change towards a BETTER SILHOUETTE :


Easy ! Believe me ! Start today by booking a flight to Bali;that's the first start, and bloody motivating ! I'll give you a nice hotel address.

1/ Run home and have a gin and tonic.
Wrong Sweety : try instead to start and finish each meal with a glass of water; pick the nicest glass you have.


Or the best place on earth .

2/ After each meal, laze down and lounge awfully in your deepest and most comfy sofa.
Wrong My Beauty : Walk for 7 minutes after each meal. The fat and all the other gross stuff won't have a chance to build on you; you'll loose all that unfriendly matter on the road !

 Look at her, she heard me .

3/ Set the table like for a banquet with presentation plates as large as a comet so that you can pile a himalaya of food on it.
Wrong Darling : check that little desert doll size plate so that you don't have the slightest chance to put anything on it.

4/ After 4.30 pm indulge freely .
Wrong Young Ducky: after the clock strikes 4.30 pm, there's One and Only forbidden sentence : " no sweets , no candy".

5/ When at the gym, spend time idlessly watching all the girls sweat through  their push-ups .
Wrong My Little Poney : YOU sweat it out thoroughly , work 80% of your capacity, and make it last, last, last until you can't feel your body anymore.



Now that you're half dead I'll switch to better counseling !

7/ Why don't you try first by listing the 7 best counsels you were ever given to get that Kate Moss silhouette ?
 Honestly, too damn thin for me . There's nothing to grab there, what a bore. I should have put my picture instead.

8/ Replace the 3 most caloric items you regularly eat ( like tarama on a blini followed by a fatty and juicy and oily hamburger and finishing with that entire Nutella 5 kilos jar hidden in your kitchen highest cabinet ) by 3 less than a single calorie food intake ( like a truck full of watery slightly cooked zucchini followed by a mere shrimp all lost in a sea of undressed salad and ending with an apple peel ).






9/ Look at slimming down as a game, not a chore. So cool down.

10/ Start today doing whatever possible to be as close to the aim you want to reach tomorrow. So, no eating, no drinking... starving. Ugh !

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